Running The Race Together

Running The Race Together (Why My Wife is Involved in My Ministry)

Her Talents are not my Talents.

I am not being sexist; your wife does things better than you do. She will have natural abilities and gifts you don’t have; that is why God has brought her into your life. She “completes you,” or I hope so.

 She is my BFF.

 Ministry is a lonely place sometimes. Pastors are lonely people with few close friends if you read any of the Lifeway polls or have read Church Next by Gibbs. If you are in youth ministry, there may be even more separation from other adults. An involved wife can be that friend you need to confide in, talk to, and who understands. Hopefully, the person you marry/married is your “BFF” already.

My On-board GPS.

A wife actively involved and presents in your ministry is the instant guidance system you need. You are halfway through a lesson and unsure if your students are getting it; look out to find your wife and get an instant reading. If you are about to say something that begs for a flood of angry phone calls, you can get the “slight don’t you dare look.” She can also point you to the student or leader that you are missing and need your attention.

Better Safe than Sorry?

We live in a world of lawsuits and abuse. Having a wife with you in person protects you from accusations, invitations, or even just appearances. A student or even a leader is far less likely to “get the wrong idea” if your wife is nearby. She can also be the “voice of reason” for your next set of great game ideas, including projectiles, fire, and chubby bunnies.

“Those” Issues.

 Yep, that is precisely what I am talking about “those female issues.” Surprisingly your 6th-grade girls don’t want to talk to you as a guy (even though I am a dad) about the time of the month that started during your week-long mission trip. Although I have learned to come fully stocked with various items in my “youth pastor bag” including different things, your wife is far better at dealing with those things. Of course, that is not the only female issue that will come up in your ministry, and for each of those, it is so helpful to have a wife involved and available for the emotional, social, mental, and spiritual lives of your girls.

My Other Leader.

Whether it be to your students, volunteers, or moms, having a female lead leader is valuable. For many of the areas I have already mentioned, but for so many others having your “other half,” there to be your “other half” leaders is beyond priceless. Whether she is “paid to be there” or not, she is considered part of the package. If she understands that and owns that, both of you will gain in the eyes of your ministry, but also with parents and the rest of the church.

 A Different Perspective.

Somewhat related to being your onboard GPS, your wife can offer you a different female perspective on things. Whether it be a passage you teach, a counseling issue, or just plain your ministry vision. She shows you a second set of eyes and ears. Pretty much everything. There are things you will just miss or not get without her.

The Checking Account.

No, I am not talking about money, although that could be a marvelous bonus #11; I am talking about accountability. You may already have an accountability partner, but your wife is the original true partner and one you are accountable to before God. Who else in your life is going to know you as well as your wife? If your wife is part of your ministry, she can keep you accountable, honest, and in check. She can call you out in the areas you need it. She will also…stop and read slowly…Keep You Humble!

The Pedestal. 

 She is already up there as your wife. You should (if you don’t) be putting her up on a pedestal in your marriage. Our ministry/church is putting you both up there too. Whether you like it or not, you, your wife, your family, and your marriage are being examined under a microscope. Biblically, that is part of the job description; see I Timothy 3:1-7 and Titus 1:5-9. So many students from broken homes and lives are looking to see if you are the husband, father, and person you are teaching about. Your wife and you walking together visibly in ministry give your students an example of marriage. Your wife involved gives male and female students an example of a Godly Woman. Choose to embrace the ups and downs of our lives to be appropriately honest and authentic about who we are as individuals and as a couple. Your wife, whether or not she shows up to your meetings and events, is still an example.